10 Key Bible Verses on Friendship

This article is part of the Key Bible Verses series.

All commentary notes adapted from the ESV Study Bible.

1. Proverbs 27:9–10

Oil and perfume make the heart glad,
and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.
Do not forsake your friend and your father’s friend,
and do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity.
Better is a neighbor who is near
than a brother who is far away. Read More

These four proverbs each teach an element of wisdom that can stand on its own, but they have additional application when taken together. Prov. 27:7 says that something bitter is sweet to a hungry man, while Prov. 27:9 speaks of the sweetness of earnest counsel. Together, Prov. 27:7 and Prov. 27:9 suggest that it is good to have friends for the occasional party, but it is better yet to have a friend willing and able to give good advice. Verse 8 speaks of someone who wanders far from his home (his immediate family) and leaves it unprotected, while Prov. 27:10 concerns someone in need whose brother (his immediate family) is far away. Together, they teach that there are benefits in remaining close to family, but a person should not hesitate to turn to a true friend when in need.

2. Ecclesiastes 4:9–12

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Read More

Two . . . have a good reward for their toil. The wise person will pursue cooperative ventures rather than give in to jealous striving to be first (contrast Eccl. 4:8, 10, 11), a striving that isolates him from others.

A threefold cord stands for the great value of “plurality” (more than one or even two) as opposed to being alone (Eccl. 4:7–11).

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3. Colossians 3:12–14

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. Read More

bearing with one another. Tolerance is a virtue within the Christian community, although Paul clearly does not want the Colossians to tolerate the false teaching. forgiving each other . . . as the Lord has forgiven you. When wronged and betrayed, Christians are called to forgive others, even as they have been forgiven for their betrayal of Christ. See Matt. 6:12, 14–15; Matt. 18:21–22.

Above all else, Christians are called on to love one another (see 1 Cor. 13). Binds . . . together may suggest that love unites all the virtues.

4. Proverbs 27:5–6

Better is open rebuke
than hidden love.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend;
profuse are the kisses of an enemy. Read More

Open rebuke affords a person the chance to reflect on the course of the path he or she is walking, where hidden love perceives but fails to communicate the possibility of such a need (Prov. 27:5). The wounds of a friend are meant to cut to the heart for the good of the person, whereas the kisses of an enemy are devised to appease the heart in order to hide the hurt that has or is to come (Prov. 27:6). Cf. Prov. 28:23.

5. Philippians 2:3

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Read More

There is always a temptation to be like Paul’s opponents in Phil. 1:17 and operate in a spirit of selfish ambition, looking to advance one’s own agenda. Such conceit (lit., “vainglory”) is countered by counting others more significant than yourselves. Paul realizes that everyone naturally looks out for his or her own interests. The key is to take that same level of concern and apply it also to the interests of others. Such radical love is rare, so Paul proceeds to show its supreme reality in the life of Christ (Phil. 2:5–11).

6. Proverbs 13:20

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Read More

Regular companions inevitably influence each other, for good or for ill. Walking with the wise (see Prov. 13: 20–21) includes prudence to care for children (1) by providing a material inheritance that extends even to grandchildren (on inheritance in Israel, see Num. 27:5–11; Deut. 21:15–17), and (2) by providing moral discipline (Prov. 13:24). In thus seeking to provide, parents ought also to pursue justice (Prov. 13:23), exhibiting their faith that the righteous will have enough to satisfy (Prov. 13:25; cf. Prov. 13:21).

7. Job 6:14

He who withholds kindness from a friend
forsakes the fear of the Almighty. Read More

After Eliphaz suggests that Job should consider his suffering as an indication that he has been a fool (see Job 5:3ff.), Job argues that one who withholds kindness from a friend is himself acting out of accord with wisdom (i.e., forsakes the fear of the Almighty).

8. Proverbs 22:24–25

Make no friendship with a man given to anger,
nor go with a wrathful man,
lest you learn his ways
and entangle yourself in a snare. Read More

lest you learn his ways. A bad attitude toward life and people is contagious and deadly; therefore the wise will choose their friends carefully.

9. Romans 12:9–10

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Read More

The remainder of the chapter 12 is a description of the life that is pleasing to God. Not surprisingly, love heads the list, for all that Paul says is embraced by the call to love. genuine. Love cannot be reduced to sentimentalism. abhor. Christians are to hate evil.

10. John 15:12–15

“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you.” Read More

love one another. On Jesus’s “love commandment” (John 15:12–17). You are my friends implies a stunning level of comfortable personal interaction with one who is also the eternal, omnipotent Creator of the universe (see John 1:1–3, 10). In the OT, only Abraham (2 Chron. 20:7; Isa. 41:8) and by implication Moses (Ex. 33:11) are called “friends of God.” Here Jesus extends this privilege to all obedient believers.