10 Ways to Fracture Your Church
Jesus’s Prayer for the Church
Toward the end of Jesus’s life on earth, he prayed that his people may be united. His prayer was deep. He said, “I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me” (John 17:20–23).
Can any words be more sublime? Yet, you only have to be a Christian for a short time before you realize that churches suffer from disunity and splits after seasons of peace as surely as valleys follow rolling hills. Often, you can see the downward spiral coming from a distance. In this article, I point out ten ways in which you can fracture the church to which you belong. Most of these ways can be caused by anyone. The last few are normally caused by church leaders. If any of these describe your actions or your attitude, may God give you grace to amend your ways for the sake of Christ who desires his people to be truly united.
Unity
Conrad Mbewe
In this concise guide, Conrad Mbewe explores unity as a fruit of the gospel, urging believers to respond to Paul’s apostolic plea—standing together for the advancement of the gospel and the kingdom of God.
1. Self-Centeredness
If you join a church primarily because of what you can get from others, you will soon be full of complaints about “lack of love” in the church. Your grumbling is because of a failure to get from the church what you want. It is as James put it, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel” (James 4:1–2). Church is a place to love others and to be loved, to give and take.
2. Impatience with Others
Christians come in all shapes and sizes, and so the church is very much like the human family. Some are hard workers while others are lazy. Some are fast learners while others never seem to grasp the most basic concepts of life. The process of sanctification takes time. If you fail to realize this, you will become impatient and grumpy. You will be complaining about the very people you are meant to exhibit Christian patience towards. That is why the apostle Paul said, “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph. 4:1–3). Learn to be patient with others.
3. Importing Fights from Elsewhere
Sometimes your own church can be peaceful, but churches across town or in another country may have locked horns over an issue that is far removed from you. However, because you are connected to what is happening there through friends or relatives, you begin to agitate for a stance in your church that others see no need for. This has become common, especially with the advent of the internet. In the process, you brew a storm in a teacup and are seen as a mere troublemaker crying, “Wolf! Wolf!” where there is no wolf.
4. Unresolved Issues
Another way in which fights are imported is when you live with unresolved issues. You think that by changing churches or shutting out some people in the church you have closed that chapter of your life, but you have not. That grudge becomes like a bitter root that causes you to be toxic. Mole hills will become mountains by your opinion. People around you fail to understand your overreactions to issues in the church. The Bible warns, “Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no ‘root of bitterness’ springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled” (Heb. 12:14–15). This root of bitterness is usually because of unresolved issues. Learn to resolve issues instead of burying them and leaving them to fester. They can be disruptive, if not deadly.
5. Gossip and Slander
Beware when anyone comes to you and says, “Have you heard?” Nothing hurts a church more than this because often the person who is the subject of the gossip or slander is the last person to know what is being said. By the time he or she knows it, the amount of damage done may be irreparable. Those who feel hurt about this can no longer trust their brethren in the church and tend to leave if the church leaders do not act to vindicate them against the tale bearers. This is what Paul feared he would find in Corinth when he wrote, “For I fear that perhaps when I come, I may find you not as I wish, and that you may find me not as you wish—that perhaps there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder” (2 Cor. 12:20). Avoid gossip like a plague!
6. Disaffection toward Leaders
The problem with disaffection toward one’s leader is that you tend to become disrespectful toward them. This easily spreads like gangrene in the church and could lead to a split because this attitude influences others in the way they respond to the church’s leaders. Remember how in Numbers 12 Miriam and Aaron got disaffected toward Moses and started despising his marriage? Before long they were questioning his leadership and prophetic role. God stepped in to quell the rebellion, and it almost cost Miriam her life!
Church is a place to love others and to be loved, to give and take.
7. Loss of Gospel-Centeredness
This one is often a leadership problem. It is quite easy for a church pastor to keep riding his doctrinal hobby horse until the church loses its gospel-centeredness. Whereas there may be a place for this when cardinal doctrines are under attack, often this involves doctrines that captivate the pastor because his personality is drawn toward such doctrines. Once the gospel is pushed out of its central place, other things come in. You find the church being fragmented over worship styles, ethnic and cultural differences, and even generational issues. Ensure, as a church pastor, that your church is gospel-centered.
8. Failure to Differentiate Primary and Secondary Truth
This is closely related to the previous one. In this case, it is when leaders fail to see that there are some truths that are essential truths (gospel truths), while others are denominational truths (defining how we delineate our church borders), while others are personal beliefs because the Bible is not clear about them. They see anyone diverting from their beliefs as being a heretic and they want to have nothing to do with such a person. This is especially hurtful when the person being ostracized is a member of the church. Other church members disagree with the disciplinary measures and tend to leave the church with the person who has been excommunicated.
9. A Doctrinally Undefined Church
It often sounds like the best way to grow a church is by being as doctrinally undefined as possible. The assumption is that in that way you will become the church for the community. You will grow faster because any Christian will feel at home. This goes on until someone joins the church who is adamant about a doctrinal view that the church leadership does not agree with. How can that person be corrected when the church has not defined its position over the most important truths of the Bible? By the time this person is expunged from the church, he will most likely carry the unwary with him.
10. Lack of Church Discipline
The reasoning behind the doctrinally undefined church is often the same one that underlies the lack of church discipline. The thinking is that if you deal with stubborn sin in the church, you will muddy the waters and chase people away. Thus, some church leaders try to sweep the dirt under the carpet. However, stubborn sin only grows and, in the process, attracts God’s judgment. In fact, as the apostle Paul says, “For there must be factions among you in order that those who are genuine among you may be recognized” (1 Cor. 11:19). Sometimes discipline can result in blessed subtractions!
Although I have given ten ways to fracture a church, there are many more. This is only a sample. Often you will find that it is a combination of these causes that finally lead to the fragmentation. To arrest a possible breakup, you need to talk about the threat before the root of bitterness grows. Deal with it quickly. Like cancer, it must be handled as soon as it is discovered because any delay only allows the cancer to grow. As the apostle Paul said to Titus, “As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned” (Titus 3:10–11). Splits are painful. They are like a marriage divorce. They leave trauma in their wake. Occasionally there will be a just cause, but often the fragmentation is a fruit of sin which by its very nature is disruptive. Do not be the cause of such a fracture.
Conrad Mbewe is the author of Unity: Striving Side by Side for the Gospel.
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