4 Issues Your Children Are Facing That You Never Had To
The Cultural Landscape
Parenting in this culture is fraught with challenges that our parents did not encounter when we were kids. Our parents took certain things for granted that our generation of parenting no longer can. For example, the idea of “pronoun preference” was inconceivable twenty or thirty years ago.
Parenting in today’s culture can make you feel like you’re in a boat headed out into uncharted waters. The good news is that even though the culture may throw new challenges in the face of Christian parents, we believe that Scripture speaks a better, inspired, and authoritative word in which to anchor our parenting.
What’s fascinating in the current cultural moment is that even non-Christians agree that many of the biggest changes in our culture are posing massive threats to childhood well-being. This means that parenting is growing more difficult because it requires living in a culture that actively undermines, among other things, the innocence and mental health of children. We should also be encouraged that despite what seems to be very strong headwinds that cause challenges for parents today, the formula for parenting remains fairly simple: intentional engagement, tender-hearted love, and godly authority.
What Do I Say When . . . ?
Andrew T. Walker, Christian Walker
In a world filled with cultural confusion, this book provides busy Christian parents with quick and trustworthy answers to questions their children may ask about life’s toughest topics, including abortion, sexuality, technology, political engagement, and more.
That raises an important question: What in America’s cultural landscape has changed that requires more intentionality on the part of Christian parents? Many topics could be discussed related to this issue, but here are four unique pressure points that have changed the landscape for Christian parenting in this generation, requiring us to have a strategy for how to remain faithful.
1. Sexuality
Without a doubt, what has changed most dramatically over the past few decades is the scope of the moral revolution that has taken place concerning sexuality. Many of the sexual norms that we all grew up with and took for granted are now not only disagreed with and despised but are instead seen as attacks on a person’s understanding of their identity. In many parts of the country, to openly declare a Christian ethic about sexuality is equated with racism. Western culture has displaced the Christian concept of godly sexual ethics as the overarching moral guardrail to guide society and put subjectively defined sexuality in its place. While Christians can affirm the inherent goodness of our sexual design, when society pursues sexuality apart from God’s will and God’s word, despair and hurt will be the inevitable consequence.
Christian parents need to actively confront the sexual confusion of our age with a biblical worldview. We should understand our culture’s departure from biblical sexuality as a tragic social collapse. Christians are not motivated by self-righteousness when we state our biblical convictions on sexuality. No, we are motivated to tell the truth about God’s design for sexuality, marriage, and children’s welfare in hopes that all individuals would know what it means to thrive and prosper.
2. Identity
Tied to sexuality is the modern notion of identity. Identity language is everywhere. On the one hand, we can affirm the impulse to ground one’s identity in hopes of having a sense of self-worth and purpose. But on the other hand, when individuals go searching for an identity that is built on human-centered understandings of happiness and fulfillment, sin’s impact on our perception and our will ensures that we will try to ground our identity in places that are not ultimately fulfilling. Some identities are legitimate. For example, it is good to claim a national and ethnic identity since Scripture sees no inherent contradiction with those and their understanding of human dignity. But when we ground our identity in ways of living in the world that Scripture views as sinful, we will only be left with despair. Whether grounding our identity in a sexual orientation, a gender identity, or maybe some identity that is good but not ultimate, we need to understand that we are missing what it means to be truly human.
There is no better place to ground one’s identity than in being God’s image bearer. That identity is objective, universal, and equal. While it does not call us to neglect legitimate earthly identities, it does call us to reject any identity grounded in sin.
3. Technology
Technology is by far the greatest social force shaping modern parenting. If you are like us, what is available today to the average kid with a tablet or smartphone is unimaginable from the vantage point of our childhood. Whereas our days were spent riding bikes around town, now it is common to see teenagers exchange in-person interactions for digital interactions. Over-exposure to social media, alongside the algorithmic manipulation that is built in to apps, is causing a generational crisis when it comes to mental health.
There is no better place to ground one’s identity than in being God’s image bearer.
We believe that technology is something that can be harnessed for great good. We are not Luddites, and we welcome technology in our home. But technology is not simply a value-neutral resource. It is constantly shaping us, forming us, and training us in its image. If Christian parents are not intentional about having a technology policy in their home, a go-with-the-flow attitude will necessarily result in your home being inundated with thoughtless and harmful technological consumption.
4. Political Hostility
As American culture has grown more secular, society has removed Christianity from the center of cultural self-understanding. Yes, we celebrate Christmas in America, but if one were to state the Bible’s teaching on marriage, he would find himself facing incredible hostility. This puts Christians in the United States in the uncomfortable position of trying to hold on to both their Christian identity and their American identity. Can the two co-exist? We think they can, but it will require Christian parents to lean into their Christian identity and to disciple their children with ever greater intentionality. This also puts strain on Christian families as they consider how to educate their children. While public schools are the most affordable, in many places in the United States, public schools are dominated by secular forces that are hostile to biblical Christianity. Christians must be very discerning about how their children are educated. Public schools can no longer be counted on as an institution that broadly reflects a culture that aligns with Christian values—just the opposite, in fact.
While it may seem inconceivable from how we grew up, being a Christian parent in America today will require us to have a “theology of persecution” for our children. Of course, not all persecution is the same. Christians overseas are persecuted far more than Christians in America. But however it is spun, hostility is still hostility. In these moments, we must teach our children what it means to bear the reproach of Christ with joy in the face of daunting cultural pressure.
Andrew T. Walker and Christian Walker are the authors of What Do I Say When . . . ?: A Parent’s Guide to Navigating Cultural Chaos for Children and Teens.
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