What to Say to a Grieving Person

Looking for the Right Words to Say

So what can you say to someone who is grieving? We all want to know—what can we say to them? Well, you can say, "I’m so very sad with you." You can say, "I really miss. . . ." and then use that person’s name, because the person who is grieving loves to hear that person’s name.

You don’t have to make it all okay. You can say, "You know, I don’t even really understand why this has happened. But I’m so sad with you." You can say, "Hey, I remember, one of my favorite memories of. . . ." People love to hear a memory about the person who has died. You can say, "I’m so sorry you have to go through this." And you can say, "You know what? I’m going to be here to walk through this with you."

Nancy Guthrie teaches the Bible at her home church, Cornerstone Presbyterian Church in Franklin, Tennessee, as well as at conferences around the country and internationally, including her Biblical Theology Workshop for Women. She is the author of numerous books and the host of the Help Me Teach the Bible podcast with the Gospel Coalition. She and her husband founded Respite Retreats for couples who have faced the death of a child, and they are cohosts of the GriefShare video series.